Mama's House

I know it's been awhile since the last post. But there really isn't any family related news to post or at least I'm not privy to any, but if any of you do know what's going on with family or want to share anything that may interest the family, please do post. If not, you're going to have to suffer more and more of my non-family related posts like the one below.

I was watching NBC's Las Vegas - guilty pleasure of mine so don't judge - last night and I remarked to a friend how NBC's "Green Week" campaign was really annoying me to the point where I wanted to go out and hurt the earth. Don't get me wrong, I didn't aspire to nuke it or anything like that but more like go stomp on some flowers or leave an unnecessary light on. At the time I didn't know why it bothered me so much. I thought maybe it was that it turned my entertainment into a bully pulpit of sorts and the shows came off as being preachy in a sort of you must join our cult or suffer eternal damnation way. But that wasn't really it. So what was it? Well I think Jonah Goldberg explains it real well.

[Y]ou've seen the tyranny of Green even if you've never turned on NBC.

Green is everywhere. Every magazine feels compelled to do a special "green issue," but they feel so guilty about it, they ditch their glossy paper for pulp that gives it the feel of a hemp-commune newsletter that doubles as toilet paper. Food magazines have replaced "delicious" with "sustainable" as the highest praise....

Now, the predictable response to my caterwauling is that I just don't get it. Of course, Bob Costas' Dickensian studio lighting is just so much symbolism. But, they respond, NBC is "raising consciousness" and promoting "awareness."

We've heard this tone before, perhaps starting in high school, when we were told, "If we all work together, we can make this the best yearbook ever!"

And that's why, on top of all the other reasons, Green Week - and the Green Millennium it hopes to usher in - is so annoying. It plays us all for suckers.

First of all, you have enormously rich people at fantastically wealthy corporations seeking grace on the cheap with a few symbolic gestures that come at absolutely no cost and often-considerable profit....

Liberals and environmentalists love to whine about special breaks for corporations, and they work themselves into paroxysms of paranoia about how big corporations propagandize against action on climate change. The reality is exactly the opposite: GE, DuPont, British Petroleum and countless other big corporations routinely propagandize in the other direction, largely to win governmental support they don't need.

So that's what pissed me off so much. Not that it was more liberal bullshit being stuffed down my throat. But it was the fact that it basically turned the shows I was watching into thinly veiled commercials and boy do I hate commercials. It was like NBC was tricking me into watching a 3:00 am infomercial in primetime. How fucking lame is that?

I'm a little late in posting this actually but I'm not the only one - I'm looking at you Annette.

Mehran's homecoming got pushed up and he made his return yesterday. Those in the know say he looked much better upon his return than he did on departure.

So everyone, be sure to give Mehran a warm Mama's House welcome back home. How do you give a warm Mama's House welcome? With lots of cheese.

UPDATE: Annette, ignoring my wishes for a traditional Thanksgiving menu, has said she will make pansit palabok and Jade said he would make BBQ. I suppose the bbq can serve as a main dish alternative to the turkey - and seeing that I could totally screw up the turkey, that might not be such a bad thing to have - and I suppose the pansit can be some sort of side dish or stuffing alternative.

Not a bad start to the Thanksgiving menu.

So apparently I've been charged with making Thanksgiving happen. Actually, I more or less said us cousins could handle it. Now I know what you're all thinking, it probably ranges from, "Goddamnit Wayne!" to "What the fuck were you thinking Wayne?" Now before you all get upset over this, let me remind all of you that we pretty much pulled off Christmas last year when many of the titas and uncles were away. This is going to be a lot like that Christmas but with a lot more food and hopefully less of those terrible jello-shots that were made.

First things first in planning this year's Thanksgiving, the food. Of course, we gotta have turkey and since Joni got me this turkey deep fryer last Christmas, I'll be making the turkey. Yep, that's right, deep fried turkey. Doesn't this sound like it's going to be the most awesomest Thanksgiving already?

Outside of the turkey the only things we absolutely need to have are side dishes, stuffing, dessert, and drinks. Now I want to try to keep this a more traditional Thanksgiving. That means instead of dinuguan, maybe mashed potatoes. And really nobody has to cook anything if they don't want to, but remember what Robert Rodriguez has to say about cooking, "Not knowing to cook, is like not knowing how to fuck." And it would be nice if we could pull this off, seeing that we are old enough to pull something like this off. Also, you could just buy this stuff instead of cooking it yourself.

Anyway, so what would you people like to have for this Thanksgiving and what are you willing to cook or buy precooked for the meal?

Well according to this article Roland, myself, Darryll, Mehran, Austin, EJ, and Oliver would probably do best not to. Not that the article knows the aforementioned would probably produce some fucked up offspring - I kid because I love - but on other grounds.

Sonja Hastings of Fathers-4-Equality says that “no matter how decent, hardworking, and caring you may be as a father, that in the event of separation, you will more than likely not get custody of your child, you will lose up to 80% of all of your assets, you will have to pay up to five times the cost of raising a child, and most importantly you could never see your child again.”

Combined with the divorce rate it's not surprising that there's been a bit of a movement that we males from the Fonacier clan might be wise to consider.

There is mounting evidence that as men discover the terms of marriage and divorce today, they are engaging in a marriage boycott or marriage “strike”: refusing to marry or start families, knowing they can be criminalized if their wife walks out and how attractive the divorce industry has made it easy for her to do so.... In Britain a fathers’ rights group tours university campuses warning young men not to start families. Even one attorney writes a book concluding that the only effective protection for men to avoid losing their children is not to start a family in the first place.

Now the article goes on to state that men should enter marriage with complete knowledge of how screwed over they could be if things go bad and to do so with a prenuptial agreement. She also elicits advice that others would give to young men considering marriage and here are a few responses I found illuminating. First, the uncertainty of marriage.

Don't do it fellas.

I'm married, and happily so, but the more I see, the more I feel like a guy who played a slot machine while walking through the airport in Vegas, and just happened to hit the jackpot on the first try. Marriage is exactly like gambling. Yes, you're going to see a few winners, and the fact that they exist encourages a lot of other people to gamble, but that doesn't mean gambling is a good investment strategy.

Also, bear in mind that marriage isn't just one gamble. You're not going to be the same person in ten years, and she isn't either. Particularly if you have kids, an event that can significantly change your outlook on life. What are the odds that the people you'll be in a decade will get along with each other?

Find a girlfriend, treat her well, but don't ever let her take you for granted.

And because of that uncertainty I wholeheartedly agree that one should take the precaution of a prenuptial agreement. Too jaded you say? Setting up the marriage for failure or even a sign that one shouldn't get married? Well,

Finding the right mate is someting you strive for, knowing that the is no surefire way of doing it... people change suddenly or over time. Sometimes people hide some things, and sometimes you deny them. This isn't a "New" thing. So what to do?

I boils down to this: If everyone chose their mate wisely, If everyone knew everything there is to know about their mate, we wouldn't be having this conversation, would we? Both genders can change, and some do, because they don't have to try anymore.

So? Protecting yourselves legally is a reasonable fallback. Accepting the risk after knowing what it might be, is only prudent on the part of both parties.

Still not convinced that a prenup is the way to go? Well maybe Kanye can convince you. You ain't no punk are you?

Still want to get married and willing to sign a prenup? Continue reading on then.

I'm a happily married man, because I was lucky enough to find the right woman. So marriage has been a great blessing in my life.

But I realize I'm extremely lucky, because I know my happiness is unusual. I know many men who are unhappy with their marriages, and i know many men who've been victimized by the legal system in the process of their divorce.

I have a son, and my advice to him is this: When you consider marriage, know what you are risking.... Consider that carefully, and know that you are placing your hope for happiness in the hands of another. You are rolling the dice. If you are still sure, still confident you found the right woman, and willing to approach it a lifetime, irrevocable commitment - no matter what - then by all means do so. Thinking of it this way may give you the certainty you need to make the right choice.

Okay, are you still sure you want to get married? I mean seriously, you've got to be damned sure. So you're absolutely certain as certain as 2+2=4 that you want get married but want to know if you've found the right girl? Here's some advice on that,

Good sex is not a reason to get married. How do you know when you've found the right one? Ask two questions: 1) Do I care more about her needs than my own? 2) Does she care more about my needs than my own?

Good advice for men and women: When you are courting, pat attention to how your potential mate treats people with less power than them. Do they treat waitresses, cleaning ladies, and handymen with dignity and respect or are they dismissive and callous? Because that's how you'll be treating as the power relationship changes during your life.

My personal advice to men contemplating marriage is this: ask yourself if she would stay with you if she had to support you. Based on the notion that we're all supposed to marry our best friend, whomever makes the money shouldn't be the basis for the marriage. Yes, money isn't the reason for a marriage, but most divorces sure have money at their roots.

There's tons more advice given about whether men should marry in the first place and how you know when you've found the right woman and I suggest all of you guys go read it. There's a lot of experience that can be learned from.

With Halloween upcoming I was wondering what everyone's favorite candy bar is? As for me, I really like Crunch, Twix, and the always satisfying Snickers but my all-time favorite has to be Kit Kat.

It was brought up yesterday by Melanie and Tita Evie that Papa was missed. It prompted me then to ask them to share a story about Papa. Instead, Melanie thought it better that I solicit from all of you to either post or comment a favorite story or memory of Papa. I'll be expecting those posts.

For me, it's difficult to recall with the detail needed to retell a specific story about Papa. I don't know if it's simply the passing of time that fades my memory or the more bothersome idea that memorable events with him merely didn't even occur.

Notwithstanding, I can remember an oft said phrase of Papa's, "Nothing doing." This phrase would oftentimes be said while he watched the Dodgers. He would say, "Nothing doing Dodgers," damn near every time they failed to score in an inning. He would say it in such a way that it was generally expected that a MLB team was to score every single inning and that the Dodgers let him down every time they didn't. He would do the same thing with the Lakers when they didn't score on every possession. And I remember how it would greatly annoy me to no end. I don't know if I was annoyed because as a youthful fan I took any perceived slights against my teams personally; or maybe I thought it showed he didn't quite understand the game fully; or perhaps him saying, "Nothing doing Dodgers," only highlighted how terrible they were doing; but at times it would get so annoying that I would have to leave the room and stop watching with him.

So come to think of it, Papa was a lot more annoying than I wish to remember him.

USC lost, yay! The food was good, yay! It stayed mostly dry, yay! Meka killed some bad guys in Halo 3 on Legendary, yay! DJ Tropical Goodies made a pre-debut warmup, yay!

I wouldn't bet against this blog making it onto next year's list.

A recent Carnegie Mellon study used higher mathematics to answer the question: if you want to be informed about what the entire blogospohere is talking about, but you can only read 100 blogs (out of the millions available), which blogs should you read?

The blogs I'm familiar with on the list are: Instapundit, Michelle Malkin, Boing Boing, Pajamas Media, LAist, and The Volokh Conspiracy.

No need to worry anymore. Lindsey is safe.

I know all of you have been worried about me considering the numerous fires taking place in San Diego. I have been sitting inside my non-airconditioned apartment for the past 2 days doing sudoku puzzles and watching the television. So far my roomate Tiffany and I have been lucky enough to not have to evacuate our apartment. However, the air quality out here is absolutely disgusting. I can't even see the mountains around me considering the fact that all the fires are surrounding us.

I will be coming back to Simi Valley tomorrow to sit at home because of the Ventura fire, until I go to Santa Barbara this weekend for Halloween and to visit Tiffany's sister, Natasha.

For those who want to keep up with what's going on here's a google map I found on Daily News.


View Larger Map

UPDATE: Here's a map of the San Diego fire.


View Larger Map

And here's a link for all the up-to-date information.

What time is everyone showing up tonight?

So the powers that be are meeting up tomorrow to discuss what went right and wrong this past Fonacier family reunion and to begin preparations for the 2008 version, rumored to be held on August 9.

If you're not one of the powers that be but still want to be heard, you can sound off here. So feel free to say whatever you want - that's what anonymous commenting is for, you cowards - about what you liked and disliked about this year's reunion, what you would like to see happen at next year's, or any other thoughts. Disappointed that there weren't any t-shirts? Loved the selection and want to see the same menu for next year? Happy that we changed locations last minute to stay dry? Found some of the name tags inappropriate? Not enough hot chicks we weren't related to there - always a problem? Thought the neighbor was going to run us all over and thus prevent any need for further family reunions?

Anyway, if you want to see improvements and have a more enjoyable experience next year, speak up and be heard.

As for me, the last minute change of location was disappointing because I had looked so forward to spending the day at the park. So making sure weather is not a concern next time would be nice. I supposed that can be done by either having it on certain days when you know it won't rain or by having it indoors. Regarding this year's location, it was nice that someone opened up their home to all of us, especially at the last minute, so that we could stay dry. But I think that maybe having it at a house is not conducive to getting a large group of people to know each other. It was much too easy for one part of the family to dominate a room at the exclusion of other family members. There were certainly those social butterflies that moved easily from one room to the next, meeting new family members, but on the whole that was limited. So perhaps the answer is to hold it in a place without so many walls so that people can't so easily section themselves off. As for the food, the only things I ate were chips, a hot dog, and a hamburger. And that was more than enough to satisfy just me.

All in all, the first Fonacier Family Reunion went well, very well considering it was our first and the weather did not cooperate. It went well enough that I won't be skipping the next one, especially considering that it was our first and that it can be and should be even better next year.

I asked Jayden what he wanted to be for Halloween and decided to ask him what other people should be for Halloween, his answers were:

Himself: Spiderman
Annalynne: Princess
Angelynne: Princess
Mom: Dolly (I'm pretty sure he means a doll and not Ms. Parton)
Dad: Butt (said he could wear it on his head)
Roland: Cat
Faye: Cat
Vanessa: Cat

Roland is flying into town today for one of his best friend's wedding that is happening this Saturday. Annette is picking him up this afternoon. That's the excuse I'm being given anyway as to why I have to pick up Jayden.

So if Roland owes any of you money, now is your chance to collect.... Or I suppose you could just say hi to him or something.

For all you little kiddies planning on doing some trick-or-treating at the end of the month, you best prepare your route.

So who is dressing up this year and as what?

Lindsey's last comment makes me curious. What's everyone's homepage? And if the answer isn't this webpage, why not this webpage?

As for me, I use iGoogle as my homepage. Why not this site as my homepage? My iGoogle updates more often.

4 of the 9 visits to this site today have come from San Diego by a person using a Mac. Don't we all know a certain someone from there who has midterms all week long? I guess the 1 am visit shows that she was up late, perhaps doing some late night cramming.

Good luck on those tests.

Can anyone answer my question regarding one of the photos of Mama's and Papa's 50th Anniversary? I know it's a long shot that anyone could possibly remember what was so funny at that moment - thankfully captured - so long ago, but you never know.

Heck, maybe it's better that I don't know and imagine that Papa told a witty and hilarious anecdote that upon further reflection imparted some wise lesson about life and love. You know, the kind of story that puts Papa in a very admirable and favorable light and in the ranks of George Washington, Mister Rogers, and Papa Smurf. Of course, my limited and crude imagination only leads me to believe that Papa leaned over and let out a big one.

So if you know, please be kind and leave a response. Or feel free to speculate.

TO: The guy air drumming on the treadmill in front of me at the gym

FROM: WFS

DATE: 14, October 2007

SUBJECT: Air drumming while on the treadmill at a public gym

Though you almost inspired me to get on the treadmill next to you and do some air guitar, but for fear of getting my ass kicked, you're obviously in need of some help. May I make a suggestion?

I'll start off by saying it was good times celebrating Uncle's 50th, with that said, I'll probably most remember Uncle's 50th for a couple of reasons.

First, the service was terrible. So it was dim sum and the ladies with the carts came by. As usual with dim sum, maybe more so this time because we had a section of the restaurant to ourselves consisting of six tables and all of the ladies coming at one time, it was chaotic. For the most part they did their job right by asking the table if we wanted any of the dishes they were pushing around.

After it seemed like we were settled in with the several dishes we ordered, a few more dishes started popping up onto our table. Our table was only about half seated when service started and it was the empty half of the table began to fill up with dishes. Noticing this, I asked if any one at the table had actually ordered any of those dishes being set down. Everyone said no and so we asked the ladies to remove the dishes we had not ordered.

All they did was ignorantly smile and move on. Granted, they may actually not have known any english and we may have initially asked those who had not set down those dishes to take them away, which I can understand they can't do. So we pretty much had to figure out who set what dishes down and practically hand them back. Now the thing was, we were sure those who had gave us those dishes had stamped our order sheet/tab. We counted up the dishes on our table and the stamps on our tab and figured out that there were two extra stamps. When we asked the ladies to cancel those orders, we got the same ignorant smiles.

We then explained to the guy in charge what had happened and he was very reluctant to correct the situation. I mean considering we were a small part of a party of close to 40 why would we try to get a couple of dishes for free? And what happened to the customer always being right? It was understood that the stamps were for different dishes categorized by "A, B, C, D, E" for pricing purposes so it was not so easy to see what we were being charged for that was not on the table. But I even offered that he could just remove two marks from the least expensive category. In the end, he went over with us with what was on the table and each correlating stamp on the tab and couldn't explain what one of the stamps was for and even then he seemed unwilling to make a concession. Finally, he removed that stamp from the "C" category and after all that hassle we probably ended up "saving" $3.00.

The second thing I will remember is Lindsey's friend Brian. Before he arrived, he was described as someone who perpetually looked and sounded stoned. And when he did arrive sporting a Rasta style hat, he did not disappoint. Seriously, his retelling of his weekend so far that included a trip to Red Robin sounded like the sequel to a classic, I half-expected him to tell me that Doogie stole something of his.

Not so memorable moments but still notable:

• The taking of the soy sauce.
  
• Karen's cake stained mouth.
  
• The 25-30 stamps on one table's tab.
  
• Meeting Lindsey's friend The Enabler.
  
• Lindsey sporting the librarian look.

Photo by wmliu via Flickr.